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We Heal Men.
We Expose the Elephant in the Family.

Start Your Healing

SOAR believes accountability begins at the roots. Harmful behavior is not random; it grows from a family tree shaped by distorted beliefs, unmet needs, broken boundaries, and unresolved trauma left to spread unchecked. Accountability means digging to those roots, exposing them, and cutting off the patterns they produce—so harm is not passed down or repeated. This is not about blame, punishment, or excuses. It is about responsibility, measurable change, and prevention. At SOAR, accountability is proven by one standard alone: the roots are severed, and the line ends here.

SOAR defines recovery as learning how to climb out of the hole you dug—and then reaching back to help the next person do the same. Recovery is not about denying the hole exists, erasing the past, or escaping consequences. It is about taking responsibility for how you got there, building the strength and stability to get out, and choosing a different path forward. At SOAR, recovery means walking alongside newly registered individuals with clarity and compassion, helping them navigate isolation, restrictions, and reintegration without denial, entitlement, or secrecy. Healing that ends with the self is incomplete—recovery is proven when stability is shared, guidance is offered, and fewer people fall back into harm. At SOAR, recovery means standing on solid ground and offering a hand without judgment.

What Is SOAR?

Where the Conversation Finally Gets Honest

SOAR (Sex Offenders for Accountability and Recovery) is a lived-experience-led project created by Joe Nehls, a survivor of severe childhood trauma and a man who has spent more than fifteen years rebuilding his life through recovery, accountability, and daily spiritual practice.

SOAR exists for one reason:

To help people heal the wounds that made them dangerous—
especially the family wounds no one talks about.

We go to the beginning:

  • The intergenerational family bond that becomes a trap
  • The jealousy, the enmeshment, the emotional parentification
  • The secrecy that rewrites one’s identity
  • The guilt and shame that turn inward and then outward

We don’t excuse harm. We don’t minimize it.
We simply refuse to pretend the origin isn’t there.

When you name the wound, you stop repeating it.
That’s SOAR.

What SOAR Is Not

  • SOAR is not a business.
    There are no investors, profit motives, or growth targets.
  • SOAR is not a fundraising scheme.
    No upsells, donation funnels, or gated content. Access comes first.
  • SOAR is not excuse-making.
    Harm is named plainly. Responsibility is not minimized or shifted.
  • SOAR is not a replacement for the justice system.
    Consequences matter. This work happens after conviction, where prevention is often ignored.
  • SOAR is not therapy, treatment, or legal advice.
    It is educational and peer-supported, not clinical or legal.
  • SOAR is not about image repair.
    This is not public relations. It’s about internal change that reduces risk.
  • SOAR is not comfortable work.
    It challenges denial, entitlement, secrecy, and inherited patterns.

What We Do

1. Healing Through Accountability & Recovery

SOAR works directly with those on the registry and rebuilding their lives after harm.

This is not therapy. It is not legal advice. This is real-world accountability work, led by someone who’s lived it.

Offenders learn how to:

  • Understand the trauma that shaped their thinking
  • Face the harm they caused without collapsing into shame
  • Build realistic, effective safety and risk-reduction plans
  • Strengthen emotional, spiritual, and behavioral stability
  • Prepare for evaluations, hearings, and life on the outside

This is the work most never get access to.

SOAR brings it to the table plainly, honestly, and with zero sugarcoating.

2. Tools, Workbooks & Recovery Guides

SOAR creates practical, grounded tools that help people understand themselves and measure change:

  • What Now? — A survival guide for those ready to stop lying to themselves
  • Steps Across Faith — The 12 Steps expressed through five major faith traditions
  • Risk-Reduction Worksheets for real behavior change
  • Boundary & Identity Workbooks (in development)
  • Guardian-Style Parenting Tools, helping people break intergenerational trauma

These tools are simple, powerful, and built from lived experience, not theory.

3. MotherMade — Naming the Hidden Root

MotherMade is SOAR’s deep-dive project into the most taboo subject in trauma and offender work:

Intergenerational family boundary violations,  enmeshment, and invisible boundary collapse.

For many, this wound is the silent engine behind later acting out.

MotherMade exists to:

  • Tell the truth about emotional and physical incest
  • Give language to experiences men have held in silence their entire lives
  • Show how unresolved maternal trauma shapes adult behavior
  • Offer pathways toward grief work, individuation, and healing
  • Advocate for research where none currently exists

This is the wound no one names.
MotherMade names it.